Monday, January 12, 2009

Love a good snow day!

Don't adjust your computer screen, I really did scrapbook!
I so miss sitting down and creating. It is just something that gets put on the back burner too often. Not that I don't love the craziness of my life, but once in a while I like it to stop and allow me to create. Something just for me.
Snow days tend to do that for me. I love a good snowday, one where everyone is home and we have no where to go. Just love it! Put on a good pot of soup and relax for the day.

Sunday was another day on the wrestling mat. Not one of the stellar team Stillings days on the mat. Josh had to learn a hard lesson this weekend. One that I hope he can learn at 8 and not have to relearn at 18. One that I hope sticks with him and the pain of it teaches.
Josh has had a big year of accomplishments, you know the kind you are so happy for when they reach them. those ones they work so hard for. Josh made the Varsity wrestling team this year, he has been on JV for 2 years and really wanted to be on Varsity, it is a big deal, they are the ones that get all the glory. When you are on JV , you could go undefeated all year, but it really doesn't get the status that a varsity wrestler would get. You are kinda the warm up team. Not that JV wrestlers don't practice hard, but there is always someone better then you in the room , and they are on the varsity team. So BIG deal! He worked hard for it, and got the crown this year. Then Josh also won his first Open Tournament. He has gone to lots of tournaments, and kept coming away with 2nds, and 3rds. Never getting that top prize. Then Dec 27th, he got it. I thought at first he was going to sleep with it. He was so proud of it.
With Victory , sometime comes defeat. Sometimes you defeat yourself. Doesn't seem like there should be sadness in such success does it?
Life, it is a funny animal.
The defeat, he lost his drive to get better, he hit what some would call a plateau. I can see how you could do this, you work so hard...shouldn't you be able to relish in it? Yep you should for about a day! That is all the time you can have in a sport as demanding as wrestling. Because you know what, that kid Josh beat on Saturday for 1st place, beat him on Sunday for 1st place in another tournament. Yep, and beat him 10-0. Right then I saw it start happening. Josh was not the determined wrestler I saw just 24 hours before. He was what I would call cocky, over confident about himself. He figured he had won this match before he wrestled it. While on the other side was a kid who didn't want to lose again, and had come to win.
Hard loss for Josh, but still he went home with 2 pins that day and a 2nd place trophy. Not bad for a day. I thought that he had maybe learned his lesson that you can never stop working, you had to keep working harder, or you will always be 2nd, and we know that is the 1st loser.
But as I watched Josh in practice over the next few weeks, I saw him not working hard, not improving his mistakes, but getting mad at me when I pointed them out. He is a stubborn boy, and that comes right from ME! Yep sorry about that Josh. But I have had to learn when to give that up, just as he will. Well ok so I am still learning, but I can hope to teach him earlier can't I!?
So he won his league match last week, against a younger boy, not as experienced, but he didn't wrestle well at all. Hips on the mat, and sloppy stuff, that against a better wrestler, he would have not got away with. But you can't tell Josh anything when he wins, cause he only knows he won. He is 8 and winning is everything, so it was going to take a loss to get thru to him, and 2 losses in one day might really drive the point home. Well the point has been driven home. Josh actually had a defensive pin this weekend. He is up 8-0 in a match, handling this wrestler and he had his hips on the mat, he was sloppy, but again up 8-0 not listening and he pulled the wrestler back on himself and pinned himself. Not the first wrestler to ever do this, but it isn't a proud moment. He was all upset and he didn't even understand what happened. Again 8 years old. (I keep reminding myself of this) . This is where I just love our coaching staff. Len who is a guy that wrestled alot of matches in his lifetime, and also has been coaching Josh for 3 years, takes Josh and sits him on his knee, a little while after his match and talks with him. Explains to Josh what happened and why it happened. Len is a great coach and has seen Josh come along way. He wants to see Josh go further and work up to his potential. You have to love guys that take the time to teach these boys how to be champions everyday.
So on to the second match. Josh knows he must correct his mistakes and keep his hips up, let go of bad holds and stay in control. Coach needs him to wrestle up in the next weight class. So he is going against a heavier kid, but Josh is strong. The wrestler is also a 6th grader, but we don't let Josh know this. Josh doesn't make the mistakes he made in the first match, hips are up and when they get on the mat they are back up in no time. He lost 4-0 but was a much better match.
So we have since talked, we watched the dvd of his matches, yep the painful one too. Josh understands that what the adults try and teach him is what he needs to learn, and we aren't trying to tell him things just to talk, but to actually help him be a better wrestler. Also I let him know that if I didn't believe in him and believe that he would win more 1st place trophies , then I wouldn't even try and get him to be better. I just hope he is going to start understanding it. I just hope he can start to drive himself again , like he did last year to reach his goals. He needs new ones. We set some last night. We are a team, and team Stillings is back on track!
Not sure everyone will understand this whole post about 8 year old wrestling, but it is much more then that. It is life and as any child , Josh didn't come with a manual , and we are figuring out everything together. I would not drive him hard , if he didn't want to be a champion. But when he comes to me and tells me he wants to be a Pro football player and go to College and wrestle , then I feel it is my job as his parent to give him every tool to achieve his goals. In return he knows he has to do his very best and drive himself even more. I love Josh so very much, he is my little miracle and my everyday joy in my life. I feel each defeat and each victory with him. He does know I am his #1 fan. And at the end of the day , we cuddle and say our love yous. That is worth every tear to me.


  1. Anonymous12:26 PM

    OK Lady - I LOVE that layout and am officially scraplifting it!
    I have the same paper and a great pic of the kids and I from xmas... you can see how it comes out at SAVE!

  2. Anonymous12:35 PM

    OK - so I love the layout, but I love the post even more - You are an awesome MOM! So well put - I do the same thing with the girls. Becca is an awesome swimmer, but she lost heart and focus 2 summers ago and no matter what we do she will not try any harder - so we had to give that fight up and just let her swim for the fun of it.

  3. Great LO and one of my favorite pics of Josh. Nice post too. All part of life's lessons that we need to experience. Josh is a great kid. You're doing a nice job of raising him.

  4. I also love the layout-it's a great photo of josh. I am so sorry he got the wind knocked out of him-so to speak-it stinks that he couldn't savor his victory a little longer. At least he has his moms to cushion the blow and keep supporting him :)